Letting Go

For two years now my life has been an endless lesson in Letting Go. My insides are harder -- so much I can endure these days! -- but the soft me slumped on the floor in surrender begs to differ.

Letting go of expectations, and too-lofty of dreams, I feel more peace and tepid joy. I've had to let go of my father, and my family traditions, and let go of hopes that folks would change if I only tried harder. Family and friends alike, I can only be who I am.

Even as my children have grown closer to me, I let them go to lead the lives I have hopefully instilled in them to live... in honesty and boldness, feeling it all. I want to save them from this heartache and yet I can't -- for every choice they make will have a consequence only they can pay. I love them unconditionally, but I need to let go.

If we love something, set it free.

And now this. This one may take more time. Always unexpected, coldly knocked off the warm cushion I was enjoying. Pulling myself up off the ground, I feel so weak. But as I can stand, every day I will let another piece of you go.